We are currently living amid the most ebullient, lush time of the year.  Greenery grows inches every night.   The cinnamon ferns in my shade garden are unrolling like so many bright green scrolls.  Soon they will be high enough that I must peer through them to see the bird feeders.  And baby raccoons and skunks will be out and about.  We have an interesting variety of creatures in this region; opossums, raccoons, foxes, bobcats, black bears, skunks, fishers, coyotes, turkey vultures (four of which landed in our back yard some days ago; they are big birds!) and there have been sightings of a puma on and off over the years.   Our school’s mascot is the black panther, so I guess having one in the area would make sense.  There is little danger from any of these animals if good sense and caution are used.   Of course, those two qualities seem to be in short supply with much of the world.  But wild animals, unless they are starving, ill or injured, generally avoid humans if at all possible.

May brings us frequent celebratory events as the academic year comes to a close, and possibly some pensive memories as Memorial Day approaches.  Here we remember to avoid Ithaca this next weekend (Ithaca College graduation) and Memorial Day weekend (Cornell graduation).   The month’s name comes from the Greek goddess, Maia, who oversaw the growth of plants.  The Romans celebrated “Floralia” --- a five-day festival to honor the goddess Flora --- basically same goddess, different name.  And May is the month of the Full Flower moon for many Native Americans.  May could be considered the bridge month between spring and summer.  On the Liturgical calendar, the Easter season ends next Sunday with Pentecost.

My high school always held the Junior Prom in May.  Thinking of those proms sends me to my Year Books or albums to check out memories there.  Old programs, candid photos of prom nights, of decorating the gym and of after-prom parties at someone’s home all bring smiles.  No renting the Holiday Inn for us --- actually, I’m not sure the Holiday Inn existed back then.  What all this memorabilia offers besides bringing back some fun memories, is a reminder of how valuable friendships are.  I’ve been so glad I could maintain/renew friendships with former classmates and wish I could see them more often.  My class of 1960 put some very cool people out into the world.  Old friends are good; we share a connective past.  And the new friends made as we’ve moved from Maryland to Pennsylvania to the Catskills and to Spencer have also been wonderful.

Memorial Day comes, and even as we regret the necessity for it, it has become something of a gala event with its BBQs, parades and fanfare.  At home, when I was growing up, we celebrated quite simply.  We took flowers to family graves; not florist-created bouquets but flowers straight from my mother’s gardens ----fragrant peonies, roses and sprays of mock orange.  At that time, it was still possible to plant flowers and shrubs around the grave-stones ---- which we did.  In the process, my mother would tell me about the people whose names were engraved on the granite markers, giving vivid personalities to family members I had never met.

Recently I attended a funeral via YouTube.  It is, perhaps, a sign of the times --- the pandemic times --- but I’m thinking that this particular practice might continue because of convenience.  The service was quite lovely and because I couldn’t actually drive the two hours to get there, I was grateful for a way to “be there” for a farewell to someone who had been a part of my life as I was growing up.  I hope though, that this new convenience never takes the place of being together in person.  It is always better when family stories and community support can comfort us in our grief.  That should never go out of style.

A festive Memorial Day memory is the parade down Victor’s main street.  Those of us in the high school band would wear our sapphire-blue wool uniforms and hats, our polished white sneakers stepping to the rhythms of John Philip Sousa.  Why more kids didn’t pass out in late May heat, I don’t know; I guess we were a sturdy group.  When marching, I’d generally play the piccolo instead of the flute, but one year, for some reason, I played the bell lyre.  That hefty instrument fits into a leather sling around the neck and waist and weighs about a ton and a half.  Finding the right notes to hit as we stepped along the uneven street was no easy matter either.  But I remember those parades with affection.

Memorial Day is different for us now.  Our family graves are some distance from where we live and we don’t visit them often.  Truly, I don’t need to visit graves to visualize all of the people I have loved who are no longer with us.  Currently we celebrate Memorial Day by watching the special on PBS; not exciting, but usually satisfying.  Even as we memorialize our men and women in uniform, I personally think that humans should have, by now, found some way to settle differences that doesn’t require killing each other via war.  It indicates limited intelligence (or possibly a major and wide-spread mental health issue) that we use the same old methods and expect different results.

But I do appreciate and am grateful for those who have fought for our so infrequently lived-out ideals.  My father and uncle were in WWI, two of my brothers in WWII, a brother-in-law in the Korean conflict, friends in Viet Nam, the son of a friend in the Gulf War and a nephew in Iraq and Afghanistan.  Thus, in addition to the BBQs and enthusiastic flag-waving occurring this special weekend, I will be taking a quiet moment to remember ---- and give thanks for those who have in the past answered the nation’s call and for those who continue to do so when necessary.   Even more, I appreciate and pray for those who continue working to find better solutions to conflict than shooting and/or blowing each other up.  Perhaps world-wide anger management classes from kindergarten on up?

While we may sneak a few seeds into soil earlier than recommended, a firm May tradition for us is planting the garden around Memorial Day.  (I must admit that this year Kerm couldn’t resist planting potatoes on one of those warm April days, so we’ll hope for the best.)   We occasionally look back to our gardening years in central Pennsylvania a bit wistfully; we could plant nearly 3 or 4 weeks earlier, and there, our soil wasn’t stubborn clay dotted with rocks.  By late-April, Pennsylvania’s gardens would have experienced the “onion snow”, the “peepers snow” and would have peas sending up little green leaves with tendrils. Ah well………the Finger Lakes is a beautiful region.  And gardening here, or anywhere, surely has its rewards. And here we don’t take thriving plants at all for granted; considering our soil and weather patterns, they are a miracle!

Our gardens evolve in much the same way that I write.  There’s a basic plan which for us   would be four raised beds.  How I arrange the seeds/plants in those beds gets edited often, as do essays.  We no longer grow sweet corn, which grieves me, but there are several farms in the area that sell sweet corn, so it is more practical to not use up our small garden space with it. And, we don’t have to worry about the omnipresent raccoons getting to the ears before we do.  Several times I’ve tried to eliminate the vine crops --- pumpkins especially.  But every year, the thought of no Cinderella pumpkins or Long Island Cheese pumpkins or Jack Be Little pumpkins just depresses me.  They look so decorative from September through Thanksgiving, and then they provide food for deer and turkeys from Christmas on ---- so ---- they refuse to be edited out and continue to sprawl over a large area.

Our best and most useful crops are probably lettuce, tomatoes and broccoli ---- plus herbs.  And this year, I have a new mini-herb garden.  We had a super-deluxe sandbox with stone walls and a cover, but no one has played in that delightful sand box for several years.  So ----- this spring we removed the cover, removed the sand-covered toys, tilled in some good soil, and planted herbs. It is a very tiny space for a garden, but I’m looking forward to seeing it mature with all the fragrance and textures of basil, rue, Clary sage, lemon grass, parsley, etc.  All those goodies will bask in the sun and dance in the breeze, spreading fragrance.  Then too, there are all the side benefits of gardening: strengthening muscles, aerobic breathing as we go up and down our hilly yard, Vitamin D from the sunshine and mellowing of one’s mood from working in the soil.

May offers so many reasons to celebrate and be grateful, from Mother’s Day to Memorial Day and all the delightful days in between.  It is the time of year that inspires dancing whether around a May Pole, at the Prom or out on the back lawn.  Even if our feet don’t dance so well anymore, surely our hearts can.   “The gloom of the world is but a shadow; behind it yet within our reach is joy.  Take joy!”*

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Carol may be reached at: carol42wilde@htva.net.

*Fra Giovanni – Was in the Order of Friars Minor.  He was an Italian friar, an architect, an archaeologist, and classical scholar.  1433-1515.