Happy New Year again, now that we are actually in 2023.  I have so appreciated the holiday season that is just past, and wish some of the benefits could go on and on, as this says: “Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.”*   New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day were both busy and engaged because our granddaughters were here all week, and then our adult kids were here and life was lively.  There wasn’t a lot of time for year-end introspection, but in the back of my head was a little voice saying, “live this coming year well; so much can change and challenges may come, so treat each day like the jewel that it is.”

The Christmas tree, dropped needles liberally so was taken out before Twelfth Night, where it resides behind the bird feeders for the winter.  In the spring, we’ll remove it to the hill, adding it to the escape piles for small creatures.   The snow babies will, by this weekend, be tenderly packed away in bubble wrap and tissue.  The evergreen wreath, made by FFA kids, remains on the door and the outside lights will be part of our landscape until March or April.  A Christmas gift was an iron welcome sign featuring bears.  We will hang it on the porch, but we’re hoping the bears can’t read, because --- unfortunately -- they feel far too welcome already.  We are mixing the old (driveway lights) with the new (bear signage) to take us through the winter.

There are always two edges to newness.  Will the new things create discomfort?  Will I know what to do in new situations?  It usually takes some wearing before new shoes are really comfortable.  It takes a while for new acquaintances to become friends, if they are ever going to be.  A new house doesn’t really become home until it has been lived in for a bit, collecting memories.  But the other edge is vitality; without new experiences, life becomes dull, boring and tasteless, leaving us in a rut of non-growth.  Rainer Maria Rilke** said, about his new year, “And now we welcome the new year, full of things that have never been.”  It is a matter of perspective; do we believe the universe is basically friendly --- or hostile?  Whichever we believe deep inside, will color how we regard those “things that have never been”.  It could be wonderful – it could be scary - it might be uncomfortable!  Even when I’m flailing against change, or find a change disturbing, I am still glad that I’m able to experience it; still able to awake, get out of bed, make decisions, move around, fix my own tea and connect with friends.

Mornings are especially good now that there’s generally no need to rush off somewhere.  As I sit in my living room, a crackling fire in the wood stove, the day ahead of me, I feel happy and contented.  The finches, and an occasional cardinal, are socializing in a viburnum shrub outside the window, the day is quiet except for the usual traffic going by.  Because there are so many places in this world that are filled with the chaos of over-crowded streets, fear of bombings, tension and poverty, this quiet is a gift.  I am warm, not hungry and I don’t tremble in fear of armies or mobs.  Gratitude fills me up, and there is a feeling that if I am this privileged, I am surely meant, in some way, to share this plentitude.

And speaking of sharing, I am always amazed that with so many groups and individuals creating programs to help those who need assistance, that help seems to be a proverbial drop in the bucket.  I think my difficulty comes because my mind doesn’t grasp huge numbers; they simply don’t compute. So, when someone says “two billion people,” my mind has no parameters for such a crowd.  But, accepting that we reach only a small percentage of people in need, even in our own small community, we continue to make sure the food cupboard is available, contribute to those organizations that mean most to us, and make an effort to be available for people around us.  If God cares for each sparrow (as the old hymn goes) then we surely can do our bit for individuals in our arenas of life.  I think if each of us who are able, devoted a portion of time to helping, in some way, that maybe the percentage would change from a drop in the bucket to buckets-full of helped people.

The holidays are over and we are now in January, “ordinary time” on the church calendar --- with 31 days of potentially yucky weather.  I have thought about how my perspective on snow and cold has changed.  As a child and even a teenager, I liked winter.  There were snowmen and snow forts, parties with sledding and hot chocolate, dances and roller skating --- even occasional ice skating.  I remember riding in the car when I was very young, watching the snow coming at the windshield like the end of a witch’s broom --- and I thought that was really cool. Apparently, ignorance of potential danger really can be bliss!    Now I try to not go out on the roads at all when snow is coming down.  And those heavy boots, bulky coats, scarves and gloves or mittens?  As a kid, donning those things was no problem; now they weigh me down, making it difficult to be mobile.  A ski pole accompanies me on my snowy rounds outside, for balance has become uncertain!  Fortunately, we can count on fairly rapid weather changes.  There’s an up-state NY saying that if you don’t like the weather, wait a minute and it will change.  The 60-degree temperatures after Christmas while a bit weird, were pleasant though at the same time, I am aware that such outlandishly mild temps signal unhealthy iceberg melting, increasing allergies and danger to habitats for penguins and polar bears.

I don’t actually make New Year’s resolutions, but there are some changes I hope for this year.  I have, for many years, lived with a bad habit (common among humans, especially women) of neglecting things that may improve my life, but take time.  “Me time” has seemed irrelevant and a bit self-indulgent.  I think this attitude begins with having children and the need to put their welfare first.  After children, it has become a fixed habit to get over-busy with details of the house, or other activities, and the hours fly by.  I didn’t do much introspection on New Year’s Day, but I’ve determined to make space for this in tiny chunks of time every day; more quiet time for myself, to consider the state of my soul.  I’m not speaking of meditating or actively deep-breathing or planning menus; I’ll just be pondering whether or not my day has been satisfying and if it’s not, why? Am I feeling part of the universe around me, or am I bogged down in my own concerns?   If the dishes and laundry have to wait a couple more hours, life will still go on.   Then there is my flute, poor neglected instrument that it has been for several years now since my neck and fingers became more arthritic.  It was reconditioned just before Christmas; all its little key pads refreshed, and so I will work on playing again, enough to make music in my heart even if it isn’t good enough to make music in an orchestra.  And finally, along with a challenge from The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin, I’ll be spending more time outside than the usual quick tour from bird feeder to bird feeder.  Fresh air is good for my lungs and walking good for the entire body, even when it isn’t comfortable.  These things may seem miniscule, but I think they will have large impact on both my body and my attitudes.  Of course, your small changes might be way different form mine, but we all probably need one or two uplifting, happiness-engendering adjustments to our lives for 2023.  We mustn’t allow ourselves to become jaded and world-weary, nor should we be set-in-concrete with habitual ways.

As we look to the months ahead, all of us hope for good days and loving relationships.  I thought the following was good advice: 1) Do the things you love more often.  2) Let go of people or situations that drain you.  3) Sometimes you need to get uncomfortable to get comfortable.  4) Where your attention goes, your energy flows.  5) If you change your mindset, you will change your life.”*** These seem, to me, to be basic for making little changes that mean a lot; that may well improve all 365 of our days this year..

Rainer Maria Rilke may have been rosily optimistic about what his year of “things that have never been” would hold, or maybe he simply made a resolution to adjust his perspective when challenges came along.  Perhaps frequent adjusting (being flexible) is the secret to finding what we long for, and what we hope for at the beginning of each new year.  Perspective lies within us!  We are each here for a purpose, or so I believe.  So --- may we welcome in this new year, with things that have never been, and trust that whatever is new in our lives, will be right for us.

Coming next ----“What’s trump and who led?”

Carol may be reached at: carol42wilde@htva.net.

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*Hamilton Wright Mabie---American writer, essayist, editor, critic and lecturer.  He wrote books like: “Norse mythology and “Fairy Tales Every Child Should Know”.  1875-1926.

**Rainer Maria Rilke --- Austrian poet and novelist.  He was born in 1875 and died in 1926.

***quotation from Inner Growth Reset --- not just sure what this group is, but they seem to have a lab for research, and opportunities for therapy.